Eric Inglesby IF GOD TOLD NOAH TO BUILD AN ARK TODAY In the year 2013, the Lord came unto Noah, Who was now living in America and said: "Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me." "Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few good humans." He gave Noah the blueprints, saying: "You have 6 months to build the Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights." Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard - but no Ark."Noah!," He roared, "I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?" "Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah, "but things have changed." "I needed a Building Permit." "I've been arguing with the Boat Inspector about the need for a sprinkler system." "My homeowners association claim that I've violated the Neighborhood by-laws by building the Ark in my back yard and exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the local Planning Committee for a decision." "Then the City Council and the Electricity Company demanded a shed load of money for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark's move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear none of it." "Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the Greater Spotted Barn Owl." "I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls - but no go!" "When I started gathering the animals, PETA took me to court. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the accommodations were too restrictive and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space." "Then the Environmental Protection Agency ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on Your proposed flood." "I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew." "The Immigration Dept. Is checking the visa status of most of the people who want to work." "The labor unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only union workers with ark-building experience." "To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species." "So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to finish this ark." "Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine and a rainbow stretched across the sky." Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean you're not going to destroy the world?" "No," said the Lord. " The Government beat me to it."
0 Comments
What do you miss by being a Christian?
HELL! What is Hell? Hell Is: 1. A lake of fire (Rev. 20:15). 2. A bottomless pit (Rev. 20:1). 3. A horrible tempest (Ps. 11:6). 4. A place of everlasting burnings (Isaiah 33:14). 5. A furnace of fire (Matt. 13:41,42). 6. A devouring fire (Isaiah 33:14). 7. A place of torments (Luke 16:23). 8. A place of everlasting punishment (Matt. 25:46). 9. A place where people pray that others won't experience its torment (Luke 16:27). 10. A place where they cry for mercy (Luke 16:24). 11. A place where they wail (Matt. 13:42). 12. A place where they curse God (Rev. 16:11). 13. A place where they never repent (Matt. 12:32). 14. A place of filthiness (Rev. 22:10,11). 15. A place of weeping (Matt. 8:12). 16. A place of sorrows (Ps. 18:5). 17. A place of outer darkness (Matt. 8:12). 18. A place where they have no rest (Rev.14:11). 19. A place where they gnaw their tongues (Rev. 16:10). 20. A place of blackness and darkness forever (Jude 13). 21. A place where the worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched (Mark 9:48). 22. A place where they are tormented with brimstone (Rev. 14:10). 23. A place from which the smoke of their torment ascendeth up forever (Rev. 14:11). "How shall we escape, if we ignore such a great salvation?" Hebrews 2:3 1. The Bible indicates it’s what we should do. (Hebrews 10:25)
2. You will have the opportunity to worship God. 3. You will likely have some of life big questions answered. 4. The preaching of the Bible will help set direction for your life. 5. You will probably make some new friends. 6. You’ll probably see some old friends. 7. Being there is a sign of your discipleship. 8. Being there will encourage your pastors and leaders. 9. You’ll be encouraged in your walk with God. 10. You’ll likely encourage other people in their walk with God. 11. If you’re single, you may meet someone. 12. It will help you define what you believe. 13. It will help you understand the Bible. 14. If you have kids, it will teach them to value God and His Church. 15. People who attend church usually live longer (I didn’t make this one up… google it!) 16. It will give you an outlet for service and ministry. 17. It can help you develop personal leadership. 18. You’ll sing inspirational songs that will carry you during the week. 19. It will encourage you that God is good (if it doesn’t, it should). 20. It will help you to look outside yourself. 21. It will provide an opportunity to give financially to those in need. 22. You’ll receive love from other people. 23. You’ll be able to show love toward others. 24. You’ll hear about the great things God is doing in His Church locally and throughout the earth. 25. You’ll be prayed for. 26. You will be able to pray for others. 27. You’re likely to hear and be encouraged by answered prayers. 28. You will be able to give praise reports and share stories of God working in your life. 29. You will be able to worship God with other likeminded people. 30. It’s an opportunity to introduce a friend who doesn’t know Christ. 31. You’ve probably got nothing better to do. (Watching TV, or sleeping-in don’t count as better!) 32. Your family need you to go. 33. It honours God. 34. Because gathering is part of what it means to be a Christian. 35. Because it’s good to have your views and opinions challenged. 36. Because we all need regular reminders of our position in Christ. 37. It will help you acknowledge and confess your sins. 38. It helps you to be in the world, but not of it. 39. It will help you end one week, and starts the next, with the right focus. 40. It’s a break from work. 41. It will help you re-order your priorities. 42. It’s where your real friends are. 43. It will help you put your life story, into the grand narrative of scripture. 44. It will remind you that you have nothing to fear. 45. It helps take your focus off yourself and onto God. 46. It helps bring perspective and feeds the soul. 47. Because gathering strengthens your faith. 48. The discipline of going will help you be disciplined across all areas of life. 49. It will allow for support in times of need. 50. It promotes stability in your life. 51. It helps to promote a happy marriage. 52. It gives you something great to do with your kids. 53. It will help you to improve your self-esteem. 54. It will help your interpersonal skills. 55. It will help increase your ability to cope with the trials of life. 56. It will help you to be a happy person. 57. It will positively influence future generations. 58. It will provide you with an opportunity to share in communion. 59. It will allow you to take an active role in missions work. 60. It will help you be a better member of your local community. 61. It will help develop your children’s self-confidence. 62. Your children will learn the Bible. 63. It may keep you out of trouble. 64. It will help give you a sense of purpose. 65. It will shape your vision of the future. 66. It will give you eternal hope. 67. It will help you to know what you believe. 68. It will help you to know what you stand for. 69. It will encourage creativity. 70. It will allow you to be disciplined, mentored and pastored. 71. Because you’ll learn about Jesus and have the opportunity to get to know Him. 72. Because you want to go. 73. It’s a pleasant experience. 74. It will give you the opportunity to express yourself in song. 75. It beats staying at home and being alone. 76. You get to put your Sunday best on… (or your skinny jeans depending on the church). 77. You’ll find acceptance. 78. You’ll be loved. 79. You can love others there. 80. Real forgiveness is found there. 81. The gathering of God’s people will help draw you closer to God. 82. You’ll meet likeminded people. 83. Jesus will be there. 84. It will remind you that you’re not alone. 85. It will help the process of sanctification. 86. You’re likely to learn something about God, the Bible, yourself, or others. 87. Growth of the fruit of the Spirit will likely happen. 88. It will bring with it tangible and intangible blessing. 90. It’s a declaration that you’re a Christian. 91. It will give you something interesting to talk about on Monday at work. 92. Because being planted will help your life to flourish. 93. It reflects a life lived beyond yourself. 94. It will bring joy to your life. 95. A miracle you need may come to pass. 96. You’ve been promising someone that you’d go and it’s time to make good on your word. 97. Because it’s the right thing to do. 98. Because faith without works is dead. 99. It will literally change your life for eternity! “We subscribe into God's unlimited plan when we kneel in humility, live in grace and reach-out in love”
― Ikechukwu Izuakor Brush arbor meetings were religious affairs
Old-time revivals were big events in rural south after "laying by and gathering" timesBy Jack M. Willis Journal Correspondent It sounds like a feature from the old familiar Grit newspaper peddled around the neighborhood in years past, but I'm frequently asked about old time revival meetings usually held between "laying by and gathering" time for crops. One event, usually on a much smaller scale often held in sparsely populated areas, were the Brush Arbor revivals that mostly took place around the turn of the late 19th century. No, brush arbors were not constructed to support grape vines, running berry bushes or flowers, but were first constructed for crude shelter from the weather. They were usually first built when settlements were being formed into viable communities as temporary residences, and later converted to outdoor churches when a need for spiritual enlightenment was deemed necessary by the village elders. Contrary to popular belief, brush arbors were usually the first crude means of shelter to be thrown up in the wilderness areas of North Central Louisiana to ward off the elements until land could be cleared, trees felled and sawn into lumber, and dwellings could be constructed before winter set in. The site selected for the brush arbor was usually in a centralized grove of young saplings with as many trees in a straight line as possible to minimize having to dig additional post holes. The arbor was usually laid out so as to be about 20 feet wide and 25 feet long with a slight pitch to the roof. The saplings selected as posts to hold up the roof were cut off about 10 feet high and matching forked limbs were left in place to support cross timbers, to hold up the roof. It would usually take about 16 saplings or poles to provide the necessary roof support, along with about five cross bars. Most natural roofing materials used were different native varieties of bay or magnolia trees, which included eight different species, including one called a cow cumber magnolia. If the brush arbor was to be later used as a place of worship, the entire floor was hoed totally clean of all vegetation whatsoever, and rigorously swept prior to every service with a dogwood brush broom. The pulpit was usually a round slick hickory post set in the ground near the front of the arbor and standing about four feet high. A section of a split log was nailed to the top of the post with the surface for the preacher to pound his fist to make his points against sin. Benches for the congregation were made by splitting oak logs, shaping the seat with a broad axe, then smoothing the seating surface with a sandstone rubbing rock. All that labor still didn't make them any more comfortably. Notches were cut along the front edge of the pews to mark off the seat widths, and the pews were placed only on one side of the church. The women usually sat in a cowhided bottomed chair in the wagon on their way to the service, and then they arrived the chairs would be removed, and placed on the bare side of the arbor for them to sit in during the service. Sunday school groups divided into groups and held classes under shade trees which usually brought on a good supply of tick and redbug invasions to the participants, and caused an excessive amount of scratching during the main service. Following the Sunday school lesson, the congregation usually reassembled under the brush arbor for the regular service, which usually lasted about an hour because every one's guts would go to sounding off, including the preacher. For the evening service, the sole interior illumination was a pump-type coal oil lantern usually for the preacher's benefit. When the wick on the lantern began to dim and flicker the reverend knew it was time to end the service. Some of the mischievous boys in the congregation would volunteer to pump up the lantern prior to the service, and they would purposely not pump the lantern up so much, so as to cut down on the preaching time. With the service ending, the congregation then began lighting up their litered-pine torches for the trip home. The Bible says, "Give thanks in everything" (1 Thess. 5:18 HCSB). In everything?In trouble, in distress? Even interruptions?
Jesus did. When five thousand people interrupted his planned retreat, he took them out to lunch. "Then he told the people to sit down on the grass. He took the five loaves and the two fish and, looking to heaven, he thanked God for the food" (Matt. 14:19 NCV, emphasis mine). |
David Smothers
Phone:407-733-6269 The First International Church Of The Web, is a Christian church, based on the Bible and its teachings, and committed to spreading the Gospel of Christ. We have an active membership of thousands of Christians around the world. Membership in our church is free, as are our ordinations. In addition, The First International Church Of The Web is itself a ministry of our parent ministry,Saint Luke Evangelical Christian Ministries, an emerging church fellowship located in Hephzibah, Georgia, and your ordination has the full backing of Saint Luke's. So, when you've been ordained by The First International Church Of The Web, you can rest assured that your ordination is from an established, Christ-centered church. . Archives
October 2018
|